That, my friends, is but a sampling of the amazing steaks we grilled over the Labor Day weekend.

Strips, filets and ribeyes graced my grill — and only one lonely steak was left after our group scarfed the whole lot.

That steak is coveted by my husband and he eyes me suspiciously every time I go near the fridge.

“Just getting milk for YOUR CHILDREN,” I have to say.

I won’t eat his precious steak. I promise.

Maybe.

In my alone time (which is rare) I debate whether it’s worth it to eat that steak myself and blame it on some apparition . . . or a zombie . . . or a steak burglar.

But in the end, it’s much easier for me to get another steak than to get another husband.

The one I have is one of a kind. And I’d like to keep him, thank you.

Ed Levine knows good food.  And this Labor Day weekend I plan to cook some burgers for friends and family.

I don’t want to mess this up . . . so he’s going to help. Why on earth would you chance ruining a perfectly great burger???

Here are his warnings against making the 6 most common ways to ruin a burger.

1. Not Sticking to Salt Plus Beef: Use Kosher salt (and pepper!) on both sides of the beef patty before slapping it onto the grill. Salt is a glorious thing for red meat-it draws out the natural juices and helps with the charring. Try to avoid turkey, bison or other alternative meat options, which have a much higher risk of moisture and flavor deficiency. Don’t get crazy here, just stick with beef. Motz even says, “if it’s not beef, it’s not a burger.” Here is Bobby Flay’s recipe for the perfect beef burger.

2. Bad Beef-to-Bun Balance: There’s no hard-and-fast ratio for beef-to-bun balance. It’s like Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart said in ?Jacobellis v. Ohio (1964) “I know it when I see it.” In the case of beef-to-bun balance, taste it. Beef-to-bun balance all depends on your patty size. If you’re cooking up a thin patty, don’t use a jumbo bun-you don’t want a mouthful of bread and hardly any meat, do you? When in doubt, make your patties bigger or stack a double burger. It’s bettern to err on the side of more meat.

3. Condiment Overload: Building a burger with “everything” is a huge mistake. Avoid the garbage pail approach. In most cases, going beyond onion and ketchup (arguably the most popular condiment) masks the beef taste and creates an absurd flavor profile. Seriously, a pastrami burger? Pastrami is not a condiment. However, we will make one exception for Fatty Melts-when grilled cheeses become condiments.

4. Wasting Precious Burger Juices: If you’re cooking the burgers over a flame, pressing down on them will send the precious meat juices straight into the coals. Those juices are valuable-they belong in your mouth. While it’s very tempting to apply pressure with a spatula, don’t. Unless you want a dry hockey puck. Sometimes they do it on TV, but just close your eyes.

5. Overcooking: This should be a crime recognized by the federal government. For the popular medium-rare, grill the meat exactly three minutes on one side (keeping the grill lid closed) and two minutes on the other. If you’re going to add cheese, let it melt on top for another minute (and keep that cover closed!).  We like our burgers medium rare, so much we’ve even sent them back at restaurants when they go beyond medium.

6. Machine-Formed Patties: If you really want to ruin your burger, try a machine-formed frozen patty! No, don’t. While making every ingredient from scratch is not necessary (see: Heston Blumenthal’s Blumenburger) try to form your own patties from ground chuck (80 percent lean is good) purchased at your nearest market or better yet, butcher.

Photo and excerpt courtesy of food.yahoo.com.

So, any and every holiday is an excuse for me to cook steaks.

There, I said it.

Labor Day is no different. In fact, it’s the quintessential holiday for steak grillin’.

There, I said “quintessential.”

Labor Day’s the unofficial close of summer (boo!) and we ALWAYS get outside and swim and eat and soak it in. It’s fun because it signals the start of football season and a break from hot, hot weather.

But, it’s sad because, well, we LOVE summer around our house.

We’re going to relax with some steaks, some ribs and some burgers. Some friends are coming over and we’re going to talk about where the time went and how we could possibly be this old and how it came to be that the top of our kids’ heads now reach our shoulders and how our alma mater’s football team better win this year.

You know, the same stuff we always talk about — but never tire of.

How about you????